Tragedies

Today's post is unfortunately a sad one, but is meant to heighten awareness about the impact of social media and the medium by which adults and children seek fame and fortune. Various streaming platforms such as Twitch, YouTube, Trovo, Facebook, and the late Mixer offer enticing opportunities for people to grow communities and friendships all while gaming (or just chatting) behind the safety of their monitor. But what people do no immediately recognize is the danger associated with exposing yourself to the public in such a way. Sure, one might encounter very pleasant and supportive people along the way, but those choosing to undergo such a venture will inevitably encounter harsh criticism's, harassment, and trolls. It is possible to shrug off negativity especially with the help from moderators and fans, but most will not see the lingering emotional damage that comes from negative comments. These feelings often are hidden from viewers and despite a streamers stoic presence on screen, there are often latent feelings that have not resolved. If this continues, those emotions build up until they can no longer be managed; depression sinks in and seeking help feels to be a worthless endeavor. Depending on the person, the results can be tragic.

Within the past month, two streamers on the Twitch platform have taken their life: Reckful (31) and Ohlana (26). I have never personally watched either of these people, but both are reportedly to have thousands of followers and supporters, Ohlana just reaching 100,000 followers within the past few weeks and Reckful having near one million followers and 250,000 subscribers. Sure, the numbers are not comparable to the likes of PewdiePie, but they are respectable and a reflection of the number of people they have impacted. With all this success, one may argue, "They had so many people who loved them, watched them, and supported them! Why would they kill themselves? It makes no sense." Though I do not know the intimate details of each person's case, it is clear that both were suffering from depression.

Reckful admitted to his struggles with depression, which was confirmed by his ex-girlfriend, and it ultimately overcame him in the end. Prior to his suicide, he sent Tweets out requesting companionship at one of his homes, where three people could occupy the same space comfortably aloft a suite. This was followed shortly after with a string of Tweets about his ex-girlfriend suggesting they would be getting back together. However, on July 2nd 2020, Tweets with subliminal messages were published: "ahh, i feel bad for anyone who has to deal with my insanity," and "please just know in these situations the insane person does not feel in control of their actions." It was then approximately three hours later, he was found dead by suicide. Looking back at these Tweets, we get firsthand insight to a depressed mind. Despite his success as a streamer, Reckful felt alone, out of control, and unable to manage these feelings. He was overcome with emotion and chose to end it permanently.

Ohlana may not have been as outspoken about her mental health, but her tweets clearly suggested she was unwell. On July 3rd 2020 alone, she posted multiple Tweets including Alinity's emotional breakdown on stream that spoke to the barrage of criticism's she has received because of her behavior and open dialogue on Twitter. Ohlana stated, "...I genuinely hope people realize how badly constant attacks can negatively change someone's mental health." She then followed up with the Tweet, "I never met/watched Byron [Reckful] but reading the news this morning completely tore my day apart. ...you just know he brought so much happiness to the ones around him." On July 5th and 6th, Ohlana then spoke to her personal struggles: "everyday just gets harder man," "depressed ppl struggle to reach out in fear the ones closest to them will have cops show up and forcefully confine them against their will. so they're stuck feeling alone with their dark thoughts because they don't want to be trapped where they feel worse," and finally, "it's not anybody's fault." Similar to Reckful, Ohlana felt alone, out of control, and unable to manage her feelings. This inevitably overcame her and she chose to end her life.

These are just two very recent examples of people who appeared to have everything and chose to take their life to end a suffering no one else saw. Reckful was open about his illness while Ohlana was not; yet, both chose the same path. I cannot speak to what it is like to suffer from chronic depression, but I do empathize with those who are targets of harsh criticisms and unattainable expectations. Being in the public eye, however, comes with the expectation that you will eventually be judged. If you do not have thick skin, you damn well better have a strong support system. You must also be willing to talk about your feelings or at the least have a healthy outlet so that your emotions do not lead you down a path of irrational thought. These two streaming celebrities could not overcome their feelings despite the waves of support, and from this we should heed the lessons of their example's: Be kind to one another, embrace the positive, have healthy outlets, take breaks from social media, and take care of your mental health.

If you are struggling with mental illness, please consider calling 1-800-273-8255 (Suicide Hotline). I know seeking help is hard, feeling like no one truly cares. You are important and you deserve a chance - don't give up yet! Take a chance on yourself and live the life you deserve!